Thursday, May 14, 2009

Mother's Day Meanderings Part II

I know it was days ago, that hallmark holiday of holidays. I was given a certificate for a massage. NICE!

I was also given a sheet of paper with an interview on it from my 5 year old. It's like a kindergarten level mad lib. My mommy likes to, my mommy does...that sort of thing. Here are the items that made me laugh and cry at the same time:

I like when my mommy sings-----at church (now keep in mind at church he is either playing air guitar in the corner, transformers with his friends or sleeping-I didn't know he even noticed I am up there singing).

My mommy knows------everything (you betcha, tell all your friends!)

My mommy works hard on-----her projects (the gift/curse of being the child of a tellecommuting professional, he was mimicking checking e-mails at two and often will work on a "report" at the same table I am working)

Last night was the kindergarten celebration. In lieu of a formal 'graduation' children sang songs. On one he had to sign language I love you. He did so, looking right into my weeping eyes. I wept harder.

On another, he had to act out what he wanted to do when he grew up. He kept saluting. It occurred to me later, he wants to be a soldier. As an Army brat, I know, first hand, the cost, the pride and the challenge a soldier's life presents. I lived it during the cold war. He is living in the very hot, and very real, war on freedom. Inside I cringed, thinking of my baby, joining the thousands of other mother's sons, giving their lives in some desert, town or cave so far away. Outwardly, I saluted back. He'll never know the pain that choice would cause me. What he'll know, is that his mother loves him, is proud of him and would move heaven and earth to support him becoming who he was created to be. I can cry in private. I will cheer in public!

The last song they did was called, "Big, Big, Dreams". I thought of my own dreams for that handsome squirrely fella (who untucked his shirt halfway through to give his tummy a good scratch all while standing in the front row of the chorus!).

I dream, for him, and for my toddler son, that they would always know they are loved.

I dream of their wives and children hearing the wisdom, mistakes and victories that they experienced with their own mommy.

I dream of hearing their giggles and seeing their wiggles in my heart forever.

I dream of being their biggest champion, their biggest fan, that they would see themselves the way that I see them-full of potential, powerful and awesome young men.

That someday, if given a chance to mouth something into a camera, they would both say, "I love you Mom!"

Thank you Ian and Caden for making me a mommy. Thank you for taking my life and giving it back to me fuller, tougher and better than I could have ever imagined. Thank you for making me into the woman God created me to be.

With love from your Mommy.

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