It's usually a phone call that changes the landscape of your life. Suddenly and without warning a statement or two over the line is 'the moment'. The last moment when things made sense and the new, confusing and bewildering life begins.
Tuesday morning I got the call. Tuesdays are my Mondays so I was moving very slow. I was getting ready when the phone rang. It was Mom's number. I was so pleased as it marked the first time she had ever called me in years.
"Is this Kimberly Robertson?" the surprisingly male voice asked.
Do I want to be?
"Yes, this is she." Sit on the bed. Remember to breathe.
"I am sorry to have to say this, but your mother is dead."
A screeching of brakes in my mind. What?
There was more to the conversation. I can't recall what. I called my husband and father repeating the sentence, "Mom is dead."
I screamed and had to clutch the side of the bed. A sudden shaking and cold overcame me. Then the baby came up. "You got boo boo Mommy?"
I do. In my heart.
Since yesterday Gosh was it only yesterday morning? I've made seemingly hundreds of calls on the phone. I made other calls too. I've made the call on how to handle the 'arrangements'. I've made the call on what casket, outfit and other minute details.
I've called on God and taken Him up on His offer that His grace is sufficient for me. I've called the Holy Spirit to do His job as comforter. I've called on Jesus to be the Savior of my cracked soul. They have answered the call splendidly and in ways I will be sure to share later.
The call changed the landscape of my life forever. The woman of whom I have only recently begun to reconcile with is dead. Her life, her legacy, her memory is what is important now.
I'm so sorry. My heart breaks for you.
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